Good communication begins with us. It is our responsibility to take care of ourselves and build a strong sense of self that doesn’t fear differences. This allows others and ourselves to show up authentically without feeling judged, attacked, or invalidated just because someone has a different opinion. Very difficult, but worth the try.
Most of us are operating from a communication template based on our earliest years – the people we lived with, watched, and interacted with. We do not know the skills and ways of relating we picked up from them because we did not lay down memory using words, symbols, and language. We learned by doing and physical sensation. If you are still operating as though your 3 year old was the wisest person in the world, it may be time to revisit yourself and upgrade those skills.
Ever had that road trip where all you heard was “how much longer”? Today work on flipping how you interact in the car. Use this time to connect and get to know each other better.
I see so many people in my practice fighting about being right in communication … when it’s not about being right, it’s about being effective. If you feel like you always have to win, you’ve got other problems. It might be worth exploring your need to be right, your sense of self, confidence levels, ability to be a member of a team, feel valued, honored, lovable, and worthy. Being right in communication is not the end game for a healthy life, being effective is.
Have you ever wondered why people do not seem to take you seriously, hear you even when you are yelling, or pay attention to your ideas? It may be your communication style. Here are 5 ways to take control of your communication and increase your ability to influence and impact in positive ways.
